Now that is quite the internal debate that’s going on.

Since giving up meat, poultry and fish a few months ago I have decided that I wanted to bring fish back onto my plate.

For the last few weeks I have made some attempts. I’m not quite sure whether this will be a permanent decision.

My first bite of fish was a lovely backed salmon that was delicious. No problems with devouring that.

The second attempt was not as delectable. In fact it was the complete opposite. From beginning to end.

Sushi. Oh, how I missed thee… until I walked into the sushi restaurant. The odor of raw fish was no delightful aroma. Instead, I felt like I had just walked into a fish market.

‘Maybe eating at home where this fishy smell won’t bother me is the best idea,’ I thought to myself. So I followed through and ordered something to-go.

The next obstacle I found myself in was actually ordering something. After reading about how toxic some fish are and watching The Cove, I had the most difficult time ordering anything, especially the tuna. Eventually I decided to order some salmon nigiri, California roll, and a specialty roll with spicy tuna.

I went home with my mind and heart divided. I had a bad gut feeling about this. Now that I think about it maybe it was more of a guilty feeling. But I paid for the food, so I ate.

Four months ago I would have devoured the entire meal in one sitting. (Yes, I may have some portion control issues here.. but that’s another issue) But this time I could barely finish half of my meal. The taste of the fish in my mouth lingered the entire night and left me feeling like I might throw it back up. (Luckily, that was not the case)

I’m not sure if it was the restaurant or just that day, but it made me question whether sushi was now a lost love. A sad day. Very sad day indeed.

We shall see… I love to give things a second try. So tonight I will venture out again (at a different restaurant). I’ll let you know how it goes.

To be continued…